“Good Enough.” Do these words plague you frequently? Do you ask yourself, “Am I a good enough mother, wife, daughter, friend, and sibling?”
Day after day many of us unconsciously set expectations not realizing we set ourselves up for defeat and failure. We do not force ourselves to step back and say, “Am I doing good enough?” Our focus lands on doing it right, the first time.
What is a good enough mother anyway? Is it a mother who has everything in her daily life organized, who runs on a schedule, who gets everything done, who volunteers, and who either works at home or works a full time job? Is it a mother who does her best to provide for her family, without stretching herself so thin she has nothing left for herself, her job, or her family?
What is a good enough wife? Is being a good wife a “Leave it to Beaver” type wife? Or is it a wife who works jointly with her husband, keeping lines of communication open, working as a team?
What is being a good enough daughter? One who looks out for her parents and their needs? One who helps take care of her parents? One who spends lots of time with her parents?
What is a good enough friend? Is it being there for the other person no matter what? Or is it offering what you can for them?
In childhood, especially when there’s big emphasis on comparison, we are prone to not believing we are “good enough.”
What is enough? It’s up for interpretation. What one thinks is enough another may not. But truth of the matter is you have to know what “enough” means to you. “Enough” is defined as “occurring in such quantity, quality, or scope as to fully meet demands, needs, or expectations.” For the most part I agree with that. But it’s really easy to convince myself demands of others, if not done just the way they want, says I’m not good enough. People also have different expectations and it’s easy to set those expectations too high or interpret the expectations being high.
It’s no secret we live in a culture that centers on “perfection.” You aren’t good enough if you aren’t perfect. That’s a subliminal message sent to all of us.
Christy Zigweid 